My son is four years old and his favorite posession is his pacifier (which we call a binki).  My husband and  I realize that it is time for the binki to go but it is such a good crutch for us we are having a hard time getting rid of it.  When he cries the binki sooths him and he cries a lot because he has an older brother that likes to taunt him.  When he is ready for naptime he wants his binki.  It helps him fall asleep and when he sleeps mommy gets to rest of more likely clean the house and put away all the toys that seem to have exploded from their once neatly arranged baskets.  The binki is mommy and daddy’s savior many times a day.

As a Psychologist I know that the sooner he rid himself of the binki the better.  It is habit forming and probably creating an oral fixation of some sort.  As a mom, I LOVE THE  BINKI!  It helps soothe him when he is upset.  As a Psychologist I know he needs to learn to self soothe so he doen’t turn to food or alcohol.  As a mom I am dreading not having a binki when those four painful words  come out of his mouth when he is sad, tired or just upset.  Those powerful words that have taken me from better judgement of throwing awasy the binki a thousand times.  Those words that buy me free time as he is calmly sucking on his binki.  My dilema is what to do when he says those innocent words ,”I need my binki”.   What to do when there is no binki?  If I were treating a patient I would say to throw it away and just deal with the screams and cries for a few days and not to worry because it will get better.  As his mom I don’t care if he takes the damn binki to college.  Maybe I’ll bet rid of the binki next week.

Dr. Shannon